Wedded Bliss – or something like it

Seems it might be the year to get married (Sabrina – no ideas) – we’re heading down this weekend to celebrate family nuptials, and I’m actually part of a wedding party for my wonderful cousin later this spring, and just after that a niece (or one I like to call a niece) is having a beautiful East Coast wedding. In our lifetime (Steve’s and mine) that’s a lot in one year!  

And somehow in the midst of all of this Stevie and I are managing to celebrate our 10 year wedding anniversary.  Of course with all of the wedded bliss happening around us, plus one of the larger anniversaries (just like birthday’s anything with a 5 or a 0 on the end is a big deal – the rest….eh) it has me obviously reflecting on marriage, but also love and life. I want to share with you a few things I’ve learned in the first 10 years of my marriage, and hopefully will continue to learn in the next 50+.

  (I think we took the picture on top in late 2006 – just after we were married – the bottom one we too last Novemer)

I feel like I’ve been blessed to find my mate, it’s taken a few tries to get here and there are things about this relationship that make me feel like I might have gotten it right this time.   Don’t get me wrong marriage is hard, and a lot of work, but most of the time it doesn’t feel like work.  We’re just here – married, together sharing our lives.  We most things together, travel, shop (yes even at Sephora and Ulta and for me even at Harbor Freight and Home Depot), cook, clean, he’s the first person I talk to (albeit sleepily) and kiss each morning and the last person I talk to an kiss at night.  That’s the way it’s supposed to be for us, and honestly sometimes I forget that there was ever a time that we didn’t do it, or can imagine a time that we wouldn’t.

 Steve has taught me things – probably without his knowing 🙂 – He’s made me more mellow – before I met him I thought relationships we exciting with drama and fights and yelling.   And in his calm (anti-conflict way) he takes all of my riles and crap and yelling, in his own way tells me to get over myself and we move on – Ok I’m simplifying for print but in the end that’s really the way it is.  Now don’t get me wrong, he’s got a mean streak in him, you don’t want to mess with and when the time comes he’s ready to throw down with the best of them. But for the most part he’s just easy going and very basic and he keeps me that way as well.

We like what we like –  I have met a man that loves Disney as much as I do – when we’re working around the house on the weekend we listen to Sountracks like Star Wars, and the Good Dinosaur and discuss how similar or different they are.  I catch him singing the theme from Pirates of the Caribbean in the shower. And if you want to get him an awesome birthday present, get him a gift card to Disney or Hot Topic so he can expand his T-shirt Collection  – ok that’s a stretch, he loves cash, Amazon cards, Visa gift cards, so he can purchase things for his truck :). With our Vacation Club membership there’s no question that we’re going to a Disney park each year, the question becomes which one and for how long can we manage?

Old Souls – we are old souls, we’ve been this way for years but I think people are starting to see it more and more now.  We like eating early, going to bed early, we have values that align more with our parents and grandparents than our peers.  A home cooked steak and a move sounds better than any party we could be invited to and maybe even more so than that.  We could be all encompassing to each other and still be ok.  We love our friends and family, love the kids and the dogs but if it came down to it and we had to spend the rest of our lives with each other – we could do it and would really like it.

He’s learning to let me be me – I am a little out there – Ok I’m really out there. I was born and raised a hippie by two hippie parents, in the Berkely/Albany area, trust me I have very progressive ideas about life, and gardening, and keeping animals (our new beehive just came in last week), sex, love how to raise or beautifully smart and funny teenage girls to be free thinkers and loving and as much of a hippie as I can make them.  Our food should be organic and awesome tasting, we should all sing and dance during the Spring and Fall Equinox and finding life silly is always the way to go.  My husband tends to be more on the serious side, and has found some of my antics to be embarrassing at times. I’m learning not to be hurt at his own fears and realizing he just has to learn to be free – it’s not his fault his parents were not hippies and free thinkers like mine 🙂 (sorry Dena/Jay) 

And there are a thousand other reasons and habits that remind me I have met my match, my mate – my other half and sometimes my heart and soul – Lord know’s we’ve carried each other in both at different times in our relationship. As we enter into the 2nd decade of our marriage I hope we follow the same track – while I would never call our relationship easy – it would be naive to say so – may we have more good times than bad and smother waters to sail on.

Have a wonderful weekend

XOXO – Sarah


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